2021 in quotes

 I won't see you guys on the next one, but I will see you down the road

Sellainen iso elukka jolla on naulakko suussa

We meet upon the level and we part upon the square.

Not gods, englishmen. Which is the next best thing.

Venus de Milo, in flesh, not guinness and champagne

Miksi metsästää peuroja kun voi ampua rämeillä scognamiglioita.

On ne kyllä vähän vähemmän kauniita

We'll take a drink if it's offered and won't be put  out if it's not.

I'm doing my job if I look like an idiot half the time

If I just had a goddamn goddamn, this would be easy

Pottulehtori

Hihii, nyt vuodat kuiviin! Ja minä runkkaa vieressä!

What the fuck does he want us to do, shit electrons?

It's impossible to think how this could be worse .
>...and there it is.

I'm thinking a strong beer. In fact, so strong it's a beer called whiskey.

As Bear Grylls says, his three words for survival: first class travel, five star hotel, or don't do it

Try and fail, but don't fail to try

Ei sillä oo koronaa, se on seonnut lopullisesti

Panoksia räyhäkivääriin

This is a robbery! Here's all my money!

The thing about civilization is that it keeps you civil. Get rid of one, you can't count on the other

You ok?
>You keep asking that.
>>I keep wondering.

What it lacks in skookumness, it abounds in sketchiness

For the first twenty minutes you genuinely are worried you're going to die, and for the next twenty you're worried you might not

Well, me, but where the 'best' means the 'least worst'

Certainly not him. He has the emotional integrity of a stone.

He came highly recommended by some people who were trying to get rid of him

But if you do that, he will assist you in leaving the building. Through a window.

Antaa nukkuvien koirien puhua paskaa

Ei vittu näitä ihmisiä. Tulispa tulva ja meteoriitit

Vain rämeet ja Jerusalem ovat ikuisia.

SEIS TAI SOTILASPOLIISI! ASKELKIN NIIN LIIKAHDATTE!

Good morning.
>No it ain't.

Tässä voi myös laittaa liekkikuviot kynsiin.
>Voi ehkä, muttei saa.

Voi että ja muna.

Two birds stoned with one bush

If it works on the first time, it's only because you've already done it

Coffee first, profit second, safety third

Make friends with change. It's the only thing you can count on.

Dreams don't come pretty. They don't come clean and they sure as hell don't come simple. They come true.

Se on Semmonen yleinen alt-F4.

Ehmentti renkailla

Noniin, alakaa kiiltää ku sian vittu viidakossa

Voi Hefaistoksen nokkahuilu mitä tuli tehtyä

Church of the huuliaan lipova liskomies

Meillä on historiallista tietoa siitä että lonkeroporno on vanhempi ilmiö kuin ydinaseet

Lakkaa omaamasta kehontoimintoja vitun homo

Ballistista frenologiaa

Pablo spacebar

There's a lot of over there

If it looks stupid but works, it's not stupid. And inversely, if it looks great but doesn't work, it's stupid.

Viimeksi kun mä sain jotain aikaan oli se kun mä synnyin, eikä sekään ollut mun ansiosta

No ihmiset on kusipäitä, homoja, ja päissään. Ja ai niin, myös idiootteja.

Kuolemaanhan tänne on tultu

I was able to put this thing together in the deceptive free-time unit between when I think I should go to bed and decided to just poke at one more thing and when I actually go to bed like three hours later

Mutta eihän Suomessa voi itkeä ku täällä on pakkasta

En ole viisas mies. Ainakaan tähän aikaan yöstä

The plural of 'anecdote' is not 'evidence'

She'll live to steal another day

Making the choice to hold your ground to save your family? As far as last stands go, that's the one I'd pick.

I called him a brave idiot.
>There's worse things to be.

Veni, vidi, diabetes

Two wrongs make a right. Two wrights make an aeroplane.

Pancakes and criticality experiments? Is that the next step up from Netflix and chill?

Tankkitriviaa kyllä löytyy mutta heitteet ja henkselit uupuu

Nitro sex Louisiana?

Nugetti elikkä teurasjäteharkko

Kuoleminen on kyllä helpompaa kuin juokseminen

Odotukset on kovat vaikkei tässä ojassa lehmiä olekaan

Allegoriat on melkeen yhtä pahoja ku krokotiilit

By this point of our marriage, we got to spice things up, we're into that S&M stuff- she sleeps, and I masturbate.

Nowadays you just lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win, you go s little faster than the others

I'm not sure which I am less, a woman or a racing driver.
>Let's be honest we all know you've dabbled in both

Mistakes were made, but we got paid.

It is not enough that corruption is recognized, it has to be opposed. It is not enough that ignorance is acknowledged, it must be defied. Win or lose, what matters is making a stand for the virtues we will bequeath to the human race. When this galaxy is ours, we will hold a worthless prize if if we plant the last flag on the last day, on the last world, having led humanity into moral darkness

Mutta nyt, hyvät herrat, kaatakaa minulle viinaa tai muuten puhun vielä pidempään, rupean julistamaan syvällisiä totuuksia ja ties mitä filosofioita, myös eksistentiaalisia.

Mutta sitä ennen maistamme tuoreeltaan savustettua siikaa, joka on pilkitty täkäläisen järven pohjattomista syvyyksistä. Ja kyytipojaksi otamme täkäläisen kellarin pohjattomista ongittua votkaa.

Enkös minä sanonut? Sieltä hän tulee, maailman ääristä, missä -jos juoruihin on uskomista- hän on kahlannut veressä, tappanut lohikäärmeitä ja kaatanut keisarikuntia. Ja sitten hän kysyy meiltä mitä meille kuuluu. Pesunkestävä noituri.

The guy is not an idiot savant, he's a savant idiot.

Stop things move as shouldn't, make things move as wouldn't

Vasaralla löisin muttaku on oma

Live long and get some

Siis.. onko siellä nyt syntynyt Varaanijeesus?

It is better that it is late, because then it will be correct.

Let's do this right. Either we win, or we see each other at the end of days

Yeah, if you're a masochist. I mean, machinist.

Kuka kulkee kullillani?
>Kuka paskantaa vessassani?

Fuck around and find out- You may test that assumption at your convenience

The universal aptitude for ineptitude makes any human achievement an incredible miracle.

I've never dealt with a woman rotating on all axis

Mando more like drunk lando

Siitä kasvaa Putinin pää kainaloon ja voit olla yhtä suuren johtajasi kanssa

I might need to dust off my Spanish and ring up my friend Manual

This guy is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

He's not so much of a has-been, but more of a definitely won't be.

Now I'm totally good with metric, some of my best friends are metric

Henkisesti 5v, fyysisesti 60v ja ikuisesti syyllinen kaikkeen

Paska haistettu

Mie en ymmärrä mitä ajalle ja avaruudelle kuuluu. How are you time and space.

Ne on extraa, viina ja lautapelit on perustarpeita.

The dark place isn't scary because it is dark. It's scary because you are alone.

Se joka pierua pidättää ottaa taudin itselleen

Mieletön Max: Vitutus Väylä

Maanantai on viikonpäivien Uganda

Ajanmittaa tulet ymmärtämään munimiseni murheelliset mittasuhteet

Heittää sen kolmen mutkan kautta Kittilään

Over six hundred languages in the world and you chose to talk shit

If you've had half as much fun as I've had, I've had twice as much fun as you

Sillä on kuitenkin tässä kusiaispesässä iso määrä kusiaisia

Siinä ei oo mitään ystävyyttä se on pelkkää panemista.

He is drunk.
>I amm not. Not much.

How you want? Dead? Alive? Somewhere in between?

Olet ylittämässä tietä ja kameli ampuu sinua tussarilla jalkapallokatsomosta

Deeply kuvotting

Yhtäkkiä tajuat olevasi italialainen niin heti pitää heittää ittensä keinuun

Jos eksytte niin tulukaa takasin.

So I reverted to the Jeremy Clarkson school of engineering

Täällä ei mitään hattaraenkeleitä piirrellä. Mutalattiat ja saatanoita seinillä

No rest for the competent

Sometimes, if we didn't have bad luck, we wouldn't have any luck at all.

On the outskirts of the Middle of Nowhere

Suomalainen mies on kuin honka- latvasta laho ja juuresta ruosteessa

Se on ihan hyvä jätkä- aina kun se nukkuu tai sukeltaa

Emmie oo eksynyt, mie en vaan tiiä missä mie olen

Ei se ole optinen harha se vaan näyttää siltä

Meikäläisellä on diakuvamuisti

Joko mennään vai ammunko mie itteni

To die on a hill of windmills

Tuo on aina kaksipiippuinen miekka tuo juttu

The more yourself you are, the less competition you have

Mitäpä jos epäsanoisit tuon

Tämmönen oranssina pöhisevä monttu ei voi olla kovin terveellinen
>Violetti
>>Sama väri

I've kicked more ass than you've sat on

Arguing with an engineer is like wrestling a greased pig- by the time you've exhausted yourself, all covered in grease, you realize- the pig actually likes it.

Fear accompanies the possibility of death. Calm shepherds it's certainty.

Show me your thorns and I'll show you hands ready to bleed

My hands have made some good mistakes. They can always make better ones.

Honey you can't dilute a war crime

First of all, cringe, second of all, red flag.

Fuckall in a big ship.

Sodan kauhut ja kreemittömät muffinssit

Tässä on pistoolikahvan tilalla hirsimökki!

Mulla on kranaatteja! Ei ookkaan ku steroideja..

The depth of your shallowness is unfathomable

Fucking debil! Njetflix!

That ain't never coming off. Fuck the next guy.

Turns out it was masturbation, cos the next guy is invariably me.

Turpa kiinni ja syö pullaa

Se oli kyllä semmonen "päärynäjäätelöä, perkele"-momentti.

Niinku joku pudottais matkalaukullista petankikuulia porraskäytävässä

Ei tämä ole rikos tämä on terrorismia

Se kiertää kaikki navetat kertaalleen ja parhaat kahesti.

Olut ja vitutus, suomalaisen miehen perinteiset iltapuhteet

Not everybody looks at a death threat and sees a job opportunity.

And how about you, where do you think you would want to die?
>A cold ditch somewhere, just like everyone else
>>Oh, dream s little
>Fine, a warm ditch.

You believe I'm serious now?
>No but that vase over there sure does

Pitäs vetää turpaan ja tehä rukkaset

How do you like your whiskey?
>With an active desire of "do me harm"

You've got a bad habit of giving yourself good advice and then not following it.

I've smelled 'oh no' and it smells worse than that

The funeral director is gonna take a look at your ugly mug and cremate you twice so he'll never have to look at you again

We sur had fun didn't we
>Don't know about fun but we sure did have something

It's common sense.
>Must be why I've never heard of it

You don't get to take measurements for my coffin and then say it's "private"

You came here looking for blood and you're cranky cos you don't like the taste of it

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice... Repeat offender. Life sentence without parole.

Where is the... The. Clear juice. Water! Water!

Pahvi on paska pilvi, mutta pumpulilla pärjää jo paremmin

Tell me, do you like to gamble?
>I got in a car with you, didn't I.

I have taken naps tenser than this.

Oh, yes, and explain that the assassin-skin rug was just what was missing from this room's decor

Why do you care how old my deathtrap is

If you need a plasma cutter to peel your banana I suggest you find a new grocer

To the master thief, doors are but a suggestion

Puhutaanko tässä nyt parsakaalin pörssikursseista vai seksuaalisesta ahdistelusta

It's enough trouble to figure out why people do what they do, I don't have time to worry about a bunch of super sized germs a million years dead.

It's only a lie if they have the right to know

If you would like to swoon into my arms now would be the time.

Let's just assume it's all going swimming until it doesn't.

You do the hanging, not the swinging

Cars were shooting past so fast that they would turn me into a pink mist and a difficult conversation with someone's mechanic

I didn't feel good, but that didn't matter. Feeling good isn't the point. Doing good.. that's what I'm all for. That's all that matters.

No, you're not selfless. But you do act selflessly. And that's what matters.

Send a thief to catch a thief and watch the wallets disappear

She rang my church bell hard enough to make the angels nervous

Täällä tuulee niin että porakaivotki kaatuu

Kyllä tuolla nallin tappas mutta jää siitä kyllä paha mieli

Lähtee kaikki tuholaiset satiaisista anoppiin

You're the one tied to the chair, why am I answering the questions?
>I don't know, why are you?
>>Low self-esteem and tendency to follow orders-OH DAMNIT

He looked like a balloon with all the air let out. Or maybe just a balloon that's depressed

Hold on, let me clean my ears. Did you just threaten to use a priceless piece of history as a murder weapon in front of a cop?

Sometimes people who get shit done blow it. Sometimes they don't.

I'll win. Of course I'll win. But first, I will worry.

history: deleted
phone: yeeted
holy water: needed
meat: beated

Vesuri vaseliini ja vipuvarsi auttaa siihen

Is she, uhh.. nice?
>Nope.
>>Oh.
>She is smart though. And tough. And ambitious. And funny. I like funny, as it turns out. I like pretty too.

Except it's not an end. A happy middle, more like.

Hard doesn't mean the same as worthwhile

Please tell me you're having second thoughts because that would imply the existence of some first thoughts which I thought never existed.

Surviving is hard because you never get a break from it

Just believe, and against your better judgement; survive

Does that map of yours say anything?
>It's a straight hallway, you don't need a map.
>>Yeah, I was just thinking if it said something like "here there be nuclear dragons", that might be somewhat relevant.

My watch said it had only been 90 minutes but on the other hand I wasn't wearing a watch.

He was sipping something that smelled like gasoline with two sugars

Ex-cop, ex-patsy for Ramses o'Flaherty, currently extremely unemployed and not taking it too well

Rest in peace

>Yes, I would assume that the rest of him is in one piece, but we could never find it.

Once you attach yourself to somewhere or someone, you can't break apart without leaving a part of yourself behind

She felt hope and she was terrified of it

I have always possessed a sense of humor. You just weren't funny.

I should hope you know not to drink and drive. Yet here you are, drinking like a fish and driving me up the wall.

If you want to give me a panic attack in four words, "why are you here" is a good place to start

I think personal boundaries left the station when you got your goon to start spying on me.
>I am my own goon

I love you.
>And some days I believe it.

I was concerned.
>You took the door off it's hinges
>>I was deeply concerned.

The sun is beginning to set
>Yeah.
>>It is very beautiful.
>So are most things that are trying to kill you

Mä louhin aivoja noiden tyyppien kypäristä

As with most of life's problems, this one can be solved by a box of pure radiation

Eat valopalloa perkele

I have done this before. You have no cause for concern other than the great danger your life is in.

I find that the way I think of the world often affects the way it is

We may look backward, but only to ensure we've not walked this path before

If you try to save each and every sorry sop that falls into your life, you might become a hero and.. right now I wasn't sure if there was anything worse

My vices are a little bit more useful now

I don't have all second!

Grass is always greener over the septic tank

What runs like a deer and smells like a John? We're about to find out

I don't think it was scary because it was right. I think it was scary because it brainwashed your old friend and threw him through a door

Kirahvi on hevosen vituiksi mennyt prototyyppi

Miten me päästiin kerjäläisistä telamiinoihin

kyllähän se pitää olla gender reveal-partyjen lisäksi myös ne gender delete-partyt, jotka koostuu siitä että hypätään x-asennossa telamiinan päälle, ja jos omaa tarpeeksi kehonmassaa niin pääsee kerralla kaikista ongelmistaan eroon

Mikä vitun raidetykki tuo on?
>Vitun raidetykki.

As much as I hate to admit it, I'm better alive than dead. Which I have mixed feelings about, but that's my fault, so, here we are. 

You've been burning the candle at every end you can find

You would get... What's the word. Stabbed.

Nobody outranks Sergeant Safety except Major Negligence.

Corporations meet all DSM criteria for psychopathy

Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

Speak up, staging a coup here

Cheers, to the vanguard of the proletariat spontaneously rising up and seizing the means of production. ...right after coffee.

Never look for a hydraulic leak with your hands. You will die to regret it.

Happens when I drink one too many Te-Kill-Ya's

My Darling dearest, one of these days you gotta get yourself a proper husband. These knives are duller than my jokes.

Heittää terroristit mönkimästä

Do you actually know how to make this?
>First off, what is it, second.... No.

VETÄKÄÄ KÄTEEN MUTTA OLKAA KILTISTI

I am so far ahead of you I'm gonna need a passport to get back

Soon we’ll be dead, and corpses don’t have motives. The “why” dies with us. But what we do... what we make... that stays.

Like many of us, I grew up really young

Mikään ei oo edes mitenkään erityisen tulessa

Petrichor

Another job, well, done.

Mitä kauemmaksi laivat purjehtivat, mitä enemmän on löydettyjä ja nimettyjä saaria, sitä vähemmän legendoja.

Ja pimeydessä, varsinkin silloin kun järki nukkuu, heräävät hirviöt.

Kuole tai tule tapetuksi.

Adsumus, here I am

Sakradonnerwetterhimmelkreutzalleluja!

Kylässä josta olen kotoisin hänen kaltaisiaan ei kutsuttu ekstragavanteiksi. Sanottiin suoraan, rahvaan omaisesti ja arkisesti: itseään täynnä oleva moukanketkule.

Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard

You have the right to the remains of a silent attorney

Hänen iässään ei tarvittaisi kuin yksi vilustuminen, aivastus ja pieraisu, niin matka astraalimaailmoihin alkaisi

Kolmanneksi, hän selitti, puun veistely auttaa tilanteissa joissa hänen on pakko kuunnella politiikkaan ja uskontoon liittyviä keskusteluja, koska tuoreiden lastujen tuoksu lievittää oksennusrefleksiä

Hänen äänestään kuultava liioiteltu ylpeys paljasti että hän kelpaisi ritariksi yhtä hyvin kuin vuohenperseestä tehty torvi kelpaa soittamiseen

Ihmiskauppa on roistojen ja vihoviimeisten paskapäiden hommaa

Ja he sitten rakastavat ja ymmärtävät teitä pampuilla päähän

No, nopat nyt yleensäkin noudattavat pudotessaan samaa kaavaa. Ne putoavat pöydälle niin kuin niiden kuuluu pudota.

Minun käsityksen mukaan väistämättömiltä asioilta on tavattoman helppo suojautua: riittää kun ei tee niitä. 

Herran palvelija oli tainnut aloittaa illastamisen jo muita aiemmin, sillä hän oli enemmän kuin vähän hiprakassa

Ah, koti on siellä missä wifi yhistyy jo pyörävarastolla

BUDDY:

My criminal strategy needs a small and tight-knit crew, and so we will eat together, meet together, celebrate together — just like one big illegal family.

RITA:

A family! That’s so sweet!! Captain A can be the mom, and Mista Jet can be the uncle, and Miss Vespa can be the angry mom, and—

JET:

Question: in this scenario, am I the brother of Buddy or Vespa? The correct answer is neither.

NUREYEV:

Well, aren’t we all brothers in crime aboard the Carte Blanche, Jet?

JET:

No, because some of us are not men, and also we are not related.

You seen my face? I'd barely look at me either

What. Are you doing.
>I got myself a drink, just like you said!
>>And what about her?
>She came with the drink!

In other words, i know that the argument was pointless, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't win it.

A legend is an old story, a dead thing, frozen forever, and we are very much alive. Still in motion.

Do not let who you were this morning, or last week, or last year, equal who you are today. Not even the greatest talent can afford to stagnate.

If I distrust you, darling, it is only because you have proven you can do anything you set your mind to.

Is everything alright?
>Nothing has been wrong in years.
>>That is not an answer to my question

In my experience, repetition and focus are where improvement lies — in the self, and in the ship. Control over every part.

If I am alive, i might as well live.

You are not Home. But you are a place I like to visit often.

Meatspace? Meetvurstikosmos? Nötköttiulottuvuus? Murekevyöhyke?

The noise it makes is like a puffer fish had swallowed an accordion that is also a guillotine and four grenades.

Kohti kompostia!

Good timber does not grow with ease

Metal is clay that is wet by fire

Not presently taking criticism from guys dressed like an impending lawsuit

Mutta niitten peräaukkoihin voi asentaa varsijousen nuolia aika helposti

En ymmärrä mutta kärsin

You can force a horse to go to a psychiatrist but you can't make it take it's antidepressants

The game will take a while to prepare, so let's get to know each other. Drink?
>Heavily.

Here you can see trash, and to the left of me, oh look, more trash!
>Nothing that a shower and a few vaccinations wouldn't fix

If you got a needle dick you gotta fuck like a sewing machine

Saanko mie tehä siitä rukkaset ennenku mie kuristan sen

Tulispa digitaalinen Jerusalem joka ois ikuinen

Guitars may kill fascists, but a 50-horse Cincinnati will kill anyone

You know a lot of things start with potatoes. French fries, hash browns, famine.... Communism..

Okay we might be a little fucked.

I don't trust me, do you trust you?
>...yes?
>>Freak.

Ite ainaki tykkään nähdä niiden naaman ennenku ne muuttuu plasmapilveksi

Only ones that know the extent of my sins are me and God. And anyone with internet access and a credit card.

Nonsense is terminal.

Sometimes they actually do what they are supposed to and act like rational human beings with laser guided missiles.

The trick of course, as any post-colonialist will tell you, is knowing which cultural appropriations are appropriate and which are not.

That looks like a Victor II fast attack submarine...

[Torpedo explosion]

...aand now it's a reef.

[Speaks french]

>I have no idea what that means

>>Me neither.

Alright you little heathens, go sit down!

>I am sitting!

>>Well go sit down some more!

Plague Traktor

In a world where you can peel a banana backwards there's about 80000 ways to make tea and they are all wrong.

Kaikki sivistyneessä sodankäynnissä oleelliset juustolajikkeet saa omiin osastoihinsa

Aivosolut menee lentotilaan kun on horny

You get more insects on the front of a submarine

Geigermittari kourassain valtauksen valtion mailta ma hain

Ei se mies oo koskaan syntynyt, se vaan nousi suosta.

Mikä mutantti se mies on?

>Se on Ranualta.

Sieltäpä ne universumin laitamille rantautuu niinku ponkkarit ja plektrat

Näytät siltä että omistat semilaittoman dinosauruspuiston

Hän on herännyt! aikamme suurin syoryömijä

Shavings and perseholes

Minne on kaikki muuttohanhet ja mongoloidit kadonneet

Otanko mie tämän töpseliholokaustin irti?

Mirä on tämä paksu ja kylmä ilma?

Vinkuitiö

Voisipa itsekin vetäytyä helteillä joenmutkiin monnien kainaloon

Well he must be doing something, that light is blinking.

Kikkelien yksityiskohdat on tärkeitä

Peikon perhokela

Pitää vissiin ostaa uusi suihkuverho, tuo alkaa muuttumaan teoreettisesta hypoteettiseksi

Speak less, say more.

Mie oon yrittänyt nauttia helteistä mutta se ei tällä ihonvärillä onnistu

That was the third one.

>Your fifth third one?

Tiltterin vallivotka

Tää on tämmönen nopeasti virtaava kapea järvi

Sekä että ja kyllä.

Fast travellaaminen on hulluille, huorille, homoille ja kommunisteille

Alakertaan koksia lapioimaan

Pari lusikallista Brandyä tainnuttaa lapsen kuin lapsen.

Intelligence doesn’t make you less prone to taking on bad ideas, it just makes you better at defending them

Right. You are aware that traditionally, wading into a flaming inferno is actually considered bad for your health!

Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left.

The only thing two machinists can agree on is that the third is doing it wrong

Look, this wreck, it's gonna sink!

>Fukken' useless submarine if it don't

Katotaan tykkäätkö mustekalat AC/DC:sitä

Hope ain't a tactic

Can't keep a good man down? Nah, a good man prefers to go down.

You know how to keep a secret between three men?

>Shoot two of them.

Any promise made beside the word "forever" is no more but a lie that's agreed upon

There was reason to it, as the most compelling lies are comprised almost entirely of the truth

Kuulin näkyjä

They paint the world full of Shadow... And then tell their children to stay close to the light. Their light. Their reasons, their judgements. Because in the darkness... There be dragons.

But that isn't true. 

We can prove that isn't true.

In the darkness there is discovery. There is possibility, there is freedom, in the dark, once someone has illuminated it.

What's a good war crime between friends

There are no monsters in the dark, though there are dangers. Let's take care to tell the difference. Lay our attention on the latter.

Tämä on siis alkuperäisistä turtleksista, eikä mistään kompromissihakuisista konsensuskilpikonnista.

Älkää juosko kävellen

Twitter is just a tool for me. Kinda like the people on it

Juo vettä ja laita mobilattia silmään

Ai ranskalainen sähkövika? Siis, niinku, blitzkrieg?

Avaruus ei puhu puolaa

Stay calm,

Don't panic,

Shoot to kill.

My type is redheads and the ones you get traumas from.

Design oversight: trees are flammable.

Fucking amateurs.

Two seasons in Michigan: winter and construction

Luck is a by-product of good plan.

Toisaalta koska avaruuspuvut niin kiinnostaako ketään haiseeko paska pahalta avaruudessa

Ei maailma oo muuttunut yhtään vaarallisemmaksi kuin aiemmin, nykyään tehdään vaan parempia idiootteja.

Puolueenjohtaja ei ole vielä tarpeeksi kuollut

Turpa kiinni ja elä.

Pelicans are shaped like a problem.

Ota kirveestä koppi naamallasi ja pyllistä hymyillen

United plague of America

You won't be here forever. There's a whole world out there to explore, and no matter how often you come home, you know that there will likely come a time when somewhere else starts to feel like home more than here does. It's a bittersweet thought, but right now you are at the beginning of everything.

Felon DeGeneres

Light the shadow that has so dogged my steps on the brightest days

Aina sie voit vaan... Läteä vittuun. 

>Nii, muttaku lähimmät vitut on vitun kaukana

Mikä se on se... Se pultsaripalkinto mitä journalisteille annetaan

Voi elämän karut kävyt ja keppihevoset

Nekromengele

That ship is going to be one hell of a reef one day

It doesn't need do be pretty to work well, it just needs to be pretty if you're going to sell it.

Poika joka elä nyt saatana.

You May suck, but that means you're doing something

Sie kuulostat ihan kakstahtiselta majavalta

Reminds me of the time I used to put "film maker" in my resume, which, when translated from the original elvish, means "unemployed".

Selitykset ja persereiät löytyy kaikilta eikö ketään kiinnosta kumpikaan.

Tuurilla ne laivatki seilaa

>ja metsä on kaloja täynnä

Once again, technology has surpassed intelligence

Benevolent malevolence

Duuniin on tai uuniin

If you do something with enough confidence, you trick the universe into making it work

In case of an emergency or an idiot

Suuttuminenkin on vaihtoehto

First shots of World war III will be fired over a datalink

While he was busy being a mortal. Like a wanker.

Rehti Huti, Aimo Paska, Kulli-Vasili ja Katiska-Katjuska

The peculiarity of all art is that it cannot be communicated in writing alone, craft is a term which is synonymous with art; a craft requires manual dexterity which cannot be taught in books

The key that rests, rusts.

Can't swing a dead cat and not hit a blacksmith

Vitun voima compels us

MYOG: Make-Your-Own Gnome

Saapi sammakot vatsanpuruja siitä

Siinä oiski taas kaikilla suuttumista

Hell is easier to walk through if you pick a direction

If you start at the top of a ladder, there's only one way to go.

Much better than the Christmas of 1862. All I got that year was dysentery.

Toi olikin täydellisen hirveä jo valmiiksi

Helpoin tapa päästä miljonääriksi on olla miljardööri ja perustaa lentoyhtiö

A ship on harbor is safe, but that's not what ships are for

Rupiakko sie olemaan terve?

>Kyllä, mutta en mieleltäni

So you're not gonna brain us, then?

>If i thought it would help our current situation, i might.

JET:

“A collision of unlike personalities, if approached with an open mind, can lead only to a broadening of the spirit.”

JUNO:

He’s fine. See? Just like we found him. Still got the quiet wisdom and everything.

We better think fast or we'll all go up, one big flammable family

The rumors of my immortality are vastly exaggerated

Semmonen elämysmatka hevonvittuun

Sinne meni niin että mäyrät tärähti

Before Christ was a cowboy, we didn't even have dirt, it was still rocks

Reality is made out of words. If you don't have a word for something, it bothers you.

Do things that you really believe on and you won't need the approval of anyone else

I'm a profoundly imperfect motherfucker

[vihaisia persimoninpureskeluääniä]

...we have not been paid off! That much.

Jos opelin insinöörit ja suunnittelijat ei oo jo helvetissä niin jumalaa ei ole olemassa, ja tämä elämä on sarja vittumaisia varaosien vaihtoja hamaan loppuun asti, jonka jälkeen alkaa musta uni jossa et aisti mitään.

Ei ku se on kehitysvammauttajaväliäinetta

To name something is to turn it into a symbol

Remember when I told you to shut your mouth? Consider that a standing order.

Miksei tässä ole pelimoodia missä pelataan jalkapalloa krokotiilin kiveksillä?

Kun keiju näyttää B-52:lta niin sitä ei kyllä kaikki osaa arvostaa

Mikä saatanan Berliini tämä paikka on

>Ennemminkin Puolan raja, täynnä aukkoja saatana

Hope is not s prize or a gift, but something earned through resisting the ease of despair, and through digging tunnels, cutting windows, opening doors, or finding the people who do these things. They exist.

If it ain't rocket surgery, don't fix it

Two Spanish inquisitions calling the kettle black

People are supposed to be afraid of how smart he is but people are scared of how dumb he looks

There's no ethical consumption under cannibalism

Viisas mies on sanonut että ennen krapulapäivää ei kannata juoda

If you do something long enough to stop sucking at it, you stop sucking at it.

God made dirt, so dirt don't hurt.

Craft is not just function. As art is not just spontaneous creativity without skill.

There may be honor among thieves, but none with politicians

Käyn vääntämässä kobran kuivaksi ja oon sitten valmis.

People are monsters, but they do their best to keep it in check. Because if you're unable to be a monster, you will become a monster's prey.

Täällä sataa isonvihan aikaisia sotaleskiä

Passed with flying curtains.

Ono tuo pelaaja vai tosi elävän näköinen NPC

Kuten esimerkiksi nämä edellämainitut sieniä bongaavat alienit

Liekehtivistä kantarelleista tehty miekka

40 years of darkness, the dead rising from their graves, dogs and cats, living together

Not necessarily. There's definitely a small, slim chance we'll survive.

That was good. Short, and pointless.

You're nothing but an unstable short-chain molecule!

Mie ymmärsin akateemisen vartin silleen että opinnoissa kestää 15 vuotta

Semmone olo on ettei ihan heti lähtis pelaan lätkää

If i can't have my dignity at least I'll have something to read

A sharp knife cuts fast, but a dull knife teaches well.

When you're changing the world, don't ask for permissions

She's nine kinds of divine

Kuulostaa
a)keksityltä
b)hyi snapchat
c)lopeta
d)tuo porkkanapiirakkaa

Pähkinäallergiset kuolee tuohon mutta se on uhraus jonka olen valmis tekemään

Tällä manööverillä ei tule kenestäkään vanhempia

Mie olen kuule ihan aito paineilmarasisti

Mun kaverilla on ihan samanlainen Lada, mutta siinä oli kyllä vähemmän jalkoja.

Documentation is elimination

Tuolla kiiltelee, siellä on uraanit kiukaalla

Can you get salmonella through your eyes!

>Yeah.

>>Well, I'm about to.

Kahden mokan jälkeen kahvitauko

Hän toimii myös itse lavasteena

It's like looking at a memory that survived someone's death a long time ago.

Noitapotkuri

Luovaa itsetuhoisuutta

Sillä oli semmonen virka-aikamasennus

Sometimes we assume the worst because we fear to hope

Mä yritän ymmärtää että heteroita on olemassa

Not enough money to do it right but enough money to do it twice.

Verkkopaita on kyllä teoreettinen peite nahalle

Lappeenranta on Etelä-Rovaniemi.

Ei se ole mikään seikkailu jos ei tule vähän ruumiita

Mitä sanoo agitaattoriopiskelija? Eiku. Aggregaatti. Maatalouskosmetomogi.

Ootteko te sitä BLM-liikettä eli Burn, Loot, Murder

Vamos on espanjaa ja se tarkoittaa että..... Häipykää.

Mitä vittua, asennus-CD! Eletäänkö me 1700-luvulla?

Missä vitussa tässä on virtanappi?! Miksei me eletä enää 1700-luvulla?

Kauhea meteli mutta mitään ei tapahdu
>Aivan kuten arki- että seksielämäni

Voi vitun ikenet

Go away In a productive Manner!

Tuo kyllä kuolee nälkään jos sen laittaa pyöreään huoneeseen kurkkupurkin kanssa

Kouvolassa on vähemmän säteilyä mutta sielläkin vaikuttaa näkymätön tappava voima

Se on niitä jotka on parempi pitää sisällä kusemassa ulos kuin toisinpäin

Sen pitää vetää auto jalkaan ja puhdistaa housut lumesta.

Siellä oli niitä hirventaimia

You can't pour knowledge into a broken bucket. It won't stay.

I had more fun with it than monkeys on crack.

Uncontrolled progress is the philosophy of the cancer cell

When a white guy gets old enough and doesn't go to therapy, they become a stoic.

Jaha, selvä, elikkä siis vihollisen hämäämiseksi

Ei se viihtynyt siellä ku kahdestatoista puoleen päivään

Kauppachassis

In the pursuit of Great, we failed to do Good

Mikä on se maailma joka ei ole isometrinen?
>Kouvola

Neljä perusnestettä: veri, sappi, flegma ja vittu

Aleksi on kyllä meistä tummaihoisin

Sometimes "done" is the best feature