2015 in quotes

 What doesn't kill me isn't tying hard enough

Leikkaa liimaa askartele, käännä väännä hakkaa.

I find it important to remember that it is one thing to be a monster, while being monstrous is something else entirely.

Njet problem, normal katastrof!

He watched the shimmer of doubt cross his face. The temptation to lie. The decision not to.

Toiset uskoo ihmeisiin, toiset vahvaan valuuttaan. Mua ei puhuttele kumpikaan.
>Mikä puhuttelee?
>>Muuttolinnut. Se miten ne löytää aina kotiin.

Ei pidä luottaa kehenkään joka esittelee naisasioitaan julkisuudessa.

Onko typeryys teille joku tekosyy olla ajattelematta?

En mää oo kuollut. Vaan pettynyt.

Joillakin pettää rakko. Mulla pettää harkintakyky.

Luonnossa mikään ei ole kesken.

Perfect head-removal device.

Action so the highest perfection and drawing forth the utmost power, vigor and activity of man's nature.

En luule että sillä on väliä miksi jumalaa sanoo. Jumala ei huoli siitä tunnetaanko hänet Jeesuksena vai Allahina vai Buddhana vai Jehovana vai suorastaan Sinuna! Sillä jos hän on Jumala, hän tietää, että me olemme vajavaisia emmekä tiedä liikoja mistään.

Gone is gone. Lost is lost.
Death.
Death is the goal of my weary soul.

Don't say it was the smart thing. But it was the right thing.

I'm a simple warrior, my lord. Not a stupid one.

Alokas selitteli koko matkan kuinka ”hänellä on tuo selkä niin on tosi hyvä että saa kyydin”. Voi vittu on minullakin selkä. Ja sen päälle UAZ. En minä silti vaadi itseni evakuoimista, vaikka mielestäni pelkkä UAZ riittäisi perustelluksi syyksi.

I want to read about shooting natives and wild game.
>What's the difference?

>A cane muto et aqua silente cave tibi (Beware of the dog that does not bark, and of silent waters.)

WHO WOULD WANT TO WEAR AN ON-FIRE SUIT?
>COSPLAY ENTHUSIASTS!

What are you, deaf AND racist?

Normal weird or German weird?

Trust me, you can't control a person's heart.
>You can, with a little thing I like to call a deep-cycle marine battery. Or LSD.

Okay. So can you put it in a person's brain?
>...He'd suffocate?
>Not the rabbit, idiot, the chip.
>Oh, yes. Absolutely.
>Without killing the person?
>Oh. Maybe?

THESE are from a DOCTOR.
>Krieger's a doctor!
>Not the medical kind
>Uhh.. Not even the other kind. Technically.

No, the swamp water's too dirty. It's full of... whatever alligators shit out, which I assume is people.

If you're dumping stuff on the street, this could also go.
>What is it?
>>Shattered dreams.
>Smells like rotting meat.
>>Also yes.

But perhaps it is best for a person who wants to kill people joins the military to kill other people who also generally want to kill other people.

Please tell me that's a smoke grenade.
>Okay. >>... >It's not, though.

What's more romantic than a dildo party/murder?

What happened, can you walk us through it?
>Just the act of murder, not the sodomy by rubber eggplant.

Nope. But I feel faint static. I see ringing. And I taste purple.

Synesthesia sucks like a two dollar whore at a five hundred dollar a night hotel.

Uhh.. what's happening? Is it cancer again?
>YOU DRINK TOO MUCH!
>>Is that a thing?

Jesus, Mary and Joseph Stalin!

No! This has nothing to do with robotics. It's bionics! Which comes from Greek which means like... Kickass!

Sure, I'll just sign the release forms-
>Oh, there's no need for that. If, god forbid, the worst happens, there's a lot of dumpsters.

And how about our health insurances? Because I think I'm gonna need it!
>I am a doctor.
>>Yeah, if I ever want Hitler's DNA spliced into him, I'll give you a call.
>I'll be around.

I'm not a vampire!
>Doesn't matter to the stake.

Day 112- I've sealed myself in my laboratory so I can complete my second greatest experiment, and also possibly live.

I'll kill a man in a fair fight, or if I think he's gonna start a fair fight

Praise the lord and pass the ammunition

mitäs oot nössö etkä uskalla puhua niille naisille. ei ne pure. ainakaan kovaa. raapii enintään.
>Sitä varten on mies-insinööri kehitellyt mustat pakut ja jeesusteipin.

Well, technically, it's a thingie.

Surprise is never something a soldier should feel while handling a firearm

Niitten on pakko olla tarkkoja, kun niiltä puuttuu tähtäin, lämpökamera ja etäisyysmittari.

Myös ohjusmiehet näkee kauas. Helikopterit vielä kauemmas, ja parhaassa tapauksessa saamme hävittäjän niskaamme. Tiedätkös? Siitä kun suhahtaa SU-24 ohi ja oksentaa tuhansia kiloja pommeja meidän niskaan, niin on todella paha olla.

Suolenmutka ei kysele, mistä se saa täytteensä

Say what you will about them, but drug addicts rival the Germans in terms of sheer efficiency.

Tiedätkö miksi tuo meidän vaunu pystyy tuhoamaan toisen vaunun jopa neljään kilometriin? Hessu kysyi, mutta koska luutnantti ei vastannut, niin hän jatkoi. – Siksi, että sitä ei tarvitsisi tunkea johonkin saatanan ahtaalle kadulle ottamaan osumia kansipanssariin.

Niin kauan, kun tuo maatilanpoika, tuo puhelinkopin kokoinen ituniska, jaksaa runnoa kuulaa tuohon reininmetallin pesään, niin sinä oksennat ne etumaastoon.

-Talojen välistä oikealle. -Siinä on pensasaitaa.
-Ja sulla on viisikymmentä tonnia saksalaista panssariterästä. Talojen välistä oikealle.

I guess your judgement is infallible, piece of shit-wise.

He ain't gonna talk with you
>I got a car battery and two jumper cables that argue different

I believe "No shit" is the appropriate response to that observation

They don't pay me to believe, sir.
>Absolutely right. They pay you to fuck shit up.

Any last words?
>Shut the fuck up!

Mut se osaaminen tulee siitä, että on kiinnostunut, opettelee ja tekee. Jos ei opettele ja tee, ei myöskään osaa - vaikka olis kuinka mies.

Jeesus tekee ihmeitä. Meikä on vaan vitun hyvä.

This is the funniest thing I've ever read on these boards and the rest of you are bad at things generally, too.

I don't get cosplay. It's like a weekend-long Halloween in a hotel where everyone gets the herp, but there's no candy.

The precise method of icing someone with a heater is a closely guarded secret of gangster physics

Jos kynsien alta ei löydy verta, likaa ja öljyä; se on amatöörien puuhastelua

Kuolenko öisin kylmyyteen?
>Jos sen teet Suomessa kesäaikana niin se on luonnonvalintaa sitten

Nothing says I don't love you like a metal buttplate

I believe the technical term is "rusted the fuck out”

but buttloads of them were shipped to Africa, Latin America and some other places where people yearn for freedom and goat sex.

The upside is that all this hard work will cover you in masculine musk of cosmoline and make you irresistible to most women and some men

It’s 3 times thicker than AK receiver, yet considerably thinner than most ATF agents

when taking apart something with more moving internal parts than a brick, I stow magnetic shit half a solar system away.

Cementite is hard as well, but fuck that guy, he's useless.

There's also Bainite, which is wonderful magical Dwarven magic that makes blades that don't break, but that shit is way above your paygrade

I think, the saying goes, If you didn't die today on the battlefield, someone else died for you.

Siinä, missä INTJ on kaikkein kylmin ja tunteettomin ihmistyyppi, INTP on kaikkein lämpimin ja tunteellisin robotti.

I don't need areolas to draw fire on me

It's not "fair," but that's a meaningless word when referencing things you have no control over.

You didn't ask to be born half-way up a mountain, but you were, and I need you to look down and realize that mountain is really a pile of bones.

OVERSTACKING EXPLOSIVES ON ROCKS AND SENDING THEM TO LOW ORBIT
FUCK YEAH PIONEERING

building a relationship entirely on lies all for the pleasure of being with someone who hates you

The trick is to keep the spaghetti in the pockets... Not out... But inside of the pockets...

>strategically transport enemy allocated loot (aka S.T.E.A.L)

The key for being a good soldier is to be aggressive.
This doesn't mean, 'Be violent'. It means being proactive and focused
on the job at hand and confident about the future, not worrying about
past problems and mistakes. Confidence comes from knowing things will
turn out well. Knowing things will turn out well comes from being
prepared.

People put their life in their hands when they assault others, and I'm more than happy to take it away from them, because I know that it'll save someone else a lot of trouble someday.

Be fearful, but face your fears and in doing so face Me.

You can build a throne with bayonets, but you can't sit on it for long.

He knows that violence isn't the answer. He got it wrong on purpose.

You know how every movie says that without darkness there can be no light? And how every particle physicist says that's just not true? Well, that's why movie stars get laid while physicists get killed by their experiments in the first act of every sci-fi film: because love does not give one damn for truth or logic.

Since ancient times every civilizations ruler has had the same idea. When people unite under one will - they become stronger than the sums of their parts. And what do rulers use to bring people together? Language.

Go to NASA and shout "Heil Hitler" and they all stand up!

I don't enjoy killing, but when done righteously, it's just a chore, like any other.

I'd rather be a coward than stupid and dead.

It wouldn't have occurred to you would it, Grey, that you're only alive because of what he gave you?
>What are you talking about? I never took anything from him. He never gave me anything.
>Only hate, Grey. Only hate.

Before him He carries noise, and behind him he leaves tears.

As I said this was just a SKS lego moment